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Topic: BBQ Etiquette
Zaphod
Posts: 227
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Okay kids, a question on BBQ etiquette..

Should the host of the BBQ provide the meat? Or ask the guests to bring their own? (Booze is fair enough, always BYO)

A mate of mine is throwing a BBQ and is asking people to bring their own meat, which I thought was a bit cheap.

At the very least he should provide sausages and rissoles, IMO. The guests can then bring something else if they want something fancier (or a plate of salad).

Opinions?
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taggs
Posts: 1445
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
what a bum. sifn't put on sausages at the very least.
infi
Posts: 7109
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Bread and meat is the host's responsibility if it is at a home.
However, etiquette may dictate it acceptable to ask others to bring specific plates e.g. salads or desserts by arrangement.

BBQs at the beach/park for example may follow a less rigid formula.
TicMan
Posts: 2658
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
If you host the BBQ, you supply the meat - no question about it.
Obes
Posts: 5486
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Your BBQ, you choose.

Just be clear when you invite people eg. BBQ My place BYO Everything or BBQ My place, just turn up.

Also if you are a vego or some other annoying diet assume BYO and don't cry when your beencurd flavour-free pseudo snag gets some flavour from the real mystery bags.
B.Hardball
Posts: 6903
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Agree with Obes. No set rule. If you don't like it then don't go. We have BBQ's all the time at ppl's places and it's a pretty close 50 50 split - BYO or provided. If it's spur of the moment I personally would just say BYO, but if it's organised ahead of time I would try to get snags at the very least.
IncrEdible_vEgetable
Posts: 906
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
If you invite people round to your house for a BBQ the host should provide the meat, at the very least. I mean, you wouldn't invite people round to a dinner party and ask them to BYO rack of lamb or stuffed chicken breasts now would you? You want to have a BBQ? Buy the friggin meat!

Unless it's a bunch of blokes down at the park sinkin bulk piss and kickin the footy around and everyone chucks in and sends the guy who can still walk a fairly straight line to the butcher round the corner for a couple of kilos of snags to chuck on the barbie, there shouldn't be a need to BYO meat or for that matter, money for said meat.

If you are a vegtarian, what the hell are you doing at an Aussie BBQ? In fact, better get back inside before the sun melts your pasty skin right off your sad, sad face. Hippy.
Nitro
Posts: 1286
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
Snags minimum.

Some dirty topside chops is always considered.

True host & ultimate babe slayer = rumps, tbones and tater salad.
ctd
Posts: 5566
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Always supply some food, people will talk about your cheapness behind your back if you don't.
Nailbomb
Posts: 2256
Location: Melbourne, Victoria
i would say if he actually wants ppl to come then he should at least provide sausages, bread and sauce, it's not that expensive. Anything outside that ppl can take their own. There's definitely no rule set on this but it's generally expected. It's not really any different to inviting guests around for dinner and asking them to bring their own food.
Midda
Posts: 1067
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
We always bulk-buy rib fillet when we have a BBQ, usually snags too. Though, I have been to BBQs that were BYO meat, didn't really bother me. If I'm going to a BBQ, I'm more interested in knowing who's going to be there rather than just who's buying the meat.
shad
Posts: 2047
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Usually just host chooses which way to go. In the end I usually prefer bring your own so you can bbq something that you like.
Raven
Posts: 2146
Location: Melbourne, Victoria
Depends on the number of people invited as well. If you're only inviting half a dozen people, then yeah, provide the meat. If you've invited 50 people and there's no strict RSVP as such, then it's a bit hard to tell how much you'll need and how many whinging vegetarians etc there'll be.

Certainly supplying bread, sausages and hamburger patties might be expected, anything beyond might be a bit specialised though. Seriously, if you want your low-fat heart-smart BS meat, bring it yourself.
B.Hardball
Posts: 6904
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Yeh like shad said I like being able to choose which meat I'm going to eat. Host should be cooking for everyone regardless, which I think is enough.

If you had to choose whether or not to go to a party based on BYO meat or provided then you're going to the party for the wrong reasons.
Obes
Posts: 5488
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
If you invite people round to your house for a BBQ the host should provide the meat, at the very least. I mean, you wouldn't invite people round to a dinner party and ask them to BYO rack of lamb or stuffed chicken breasts now would you? You want to have a BBQ? Buy the friggin meat!


Been to dinner parties where different people bring different things.
eg. 1 couple might bring deserts, another starters, another the veges.
They are kind of cool in their own way because people will usually bring along a "signature" dish and gives people something to talk about other then the usual crap.

Anyone who has been to one of my BBQs will know I usually (over)provide everything, sometimes including booze. That said, that's just me. And I don't expect other people to do the same.
It your party, you can do what you want. Just be clear so people aren't embarrassed when they turn up with nothing and it was BYO (or vice versa)

Here's a tip tho, if invited to a party/bbq where everything is supplied. Bring a bottle of grog or some other token for the host/hostess.

Always supply some food, people will talk about your cheapness behind your back if you don't.


Only if either
1. You didn't make it clear it was BYO
OR
2. The people you invited are cocktards and you'll learn not to invite them again.


As an invitee...
If you don't like the hosts bbq/party plans. Don't go ... but don't be a little cock rag and cry about BYO or what ever (girls and gays worry about social rules and etiquette). Just make a weak sauce excuse and get on with living.
Zaphod
Posts: 228
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
If you had to choose whether or not to go to a party based on BYO meat or provided then you're going to the party for the wrong reasons.


True, but that's not what I was getting at - simply a discussion on what the rules are on this type of thing. I'm going to the BBQ either way..
infi
Posts: 7110
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Is it ok to ask guests to bring their own BBQ?
exo
Posts: 7931
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Obes' got it f***ing DOWN! I agree with the "bring your signature dish" especially, makes for a good meal. I'm in the host to provide sausages, hamburger patties, bread condiments etc" camp. Host should cook everything, unless there's special requirements.
teq
Posts: 218
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
I always supply the meat

as for bbq's, its normal for the host to provide meat and the guests to bring the piss/salads/bread etc
Superform
Posts: 4658
Location: Netherlands
bahahahaha

host: HAY GUYS COME TO MY BBQ ITS GONNA BE RAD

guests: ok we are here... wheres the meat?

host: ZOMFG meat lolz i gots tofu burgers and can you munch on some grass i forgot to mow YAY

guests: i'm no longer ur friend
ara
Posts: 1384
Location: Sydney, New South Wales

Is it ok to ask guests to bring their own BBQ?


i always bring my own gas.
zeldashadow
Posts: 27
Location: Sydney, New South Wales
I think this all depends. Back in my student days there was no way I could afford to pay for everyone's meat so it was always byo. Now I prefer to supply everything including beer, then if people want something else they can bring it along. I dont think you can expect that all your friends can necessarily afford what you can.
B.Hardball
Posts: 6905
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Yeh zaphod I wasn't having a go at you, I was trying to make the point that, as interesting as this issue is, it's not really an issue;)
infi
Posts: 7111
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
OK so invitation should go.

"Hi, you're invited to my BBQ. Please BYO Beer, wine, spirits, mixers, soft drinks, glasses, cups, shot glasses, steaks, sausages, rissoles, seafood, salads, pastas, pasta salads, desserts, savories, nibblies, cutlery, plates, music, furniture, swimming pool and cricket set.

Don't bring serviettes - I HAVE PLENTY!"
step
Posts: 1354
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
My family's customs are very different. It's considered an insult if you bring a dish over when invited, the only exception being if you are a relative / close friend and were asked to help. Then you have to make sure it's delivered early enough so the rest of the guests don't consider you an incompetent host or start petty arguments like why you didn't ask your other relatives to help / think they're lousy cooks.

Basically for every function that you invite anyone to, you supply everything (grog included). If you're unable to do so, don't bother hosting.
sc00bs
Posts: 2590
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
who gives a f***, he is ur friend. ur going to a bbq with friends, bring some food and chuck in.... u guys are all cheap c***s.

zeldashadow
Posts: 28
Location: Sydney, New South Wales
i always bring my own gas.

it's funny cos it's true. I've seen you at bbq's ara!
TicMan
Posts: 2662
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
I've been to BYO BBQ and they sucked, some c*** always takes off with my prime piece of meat before I manage to get to it.
fpot
Posts: 14730
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
Barney! You brought a beer keg!

Yeah where can I fill it up?

I think there was something in that for all of us, don't you?
Raven
Posts: 2147
Location: Melbourne, Victoria
My family's customs are very different. It's considered an insult if you bring a dish over when invited, the only exception being if you are a relative / close friend and were asked to help.

Well tell them we're in Australia here FFS and that's just what we do.
Le Infidel
Posts: 1548
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
yeah i dont get byo meat ... why have the bbq at all dont invite people you stingy prick
mystery
Posts: 15
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
IncrEdible_vEgetable
If you are a vegtarian, what the hell are you doing at an Aussie BBQ? In fact, better get back inside before the sun melts your pasty skin right off your sad, sad face. Hippy.


For that comment, I will say that not all Vegetarians have "pasty skin".
Also that vegetarians also have a right to be at a bbq even if they don't eat MEAT!
Midda
Posts: 1068
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

HeardY
Gaelic newb
Posts: 15052
Location: Ireland
you dirty c***s, I am missing BBQ's (and real meat for that matter) - in teh aparment I live in, no balcony = no BBQ :/

Also it depends on the BYO or not, most situations have been covered by others, so I am not going to get into them.

Mmmmm Scotch Fillet steak!!

P.S. the snags over this side of the world (pork sausages are the 'default' snag, are s*** house, I want my mystery saw dust and other random bits of meat munched together pls! (seriously))
Obes
Posts: 5489
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Also that vegetarians also have a right to be at a bbq even if they don't eat MEAT!


Sure, but they aren't allowed to lecture others on their meat eating habbits or complain about their plastic food being tainted by the real stuff.

And vego's never can do either of those things.
Kat
Posts: 9241
Location:
If I was hosting a BBQ I would offer meat and salads. Most people I would invite would ask if they could bring something and gauge off that what I needed to actually supply.

If they are vego's they can bring their own weird stuff
Thundercracker
Posts: 1636
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
I've been to BYO BBQ and they sucked, some c*** always takes off with my prime piece of meat before I manage to get to it.


This is the problem if everyone brings their own meat. Meat should be a more communist affair.

I always provide snags and rissoles and bread. Other people normally bring salad and certainly BYO drinks.

I also tend to provide light/mid beer because
A) Most people won't drink it.
B) It's good for people who have to drive and want something light.

And remember people:
You can't make friends with salad.
SCOGGEX
Posts: 774
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
sif host a BBQ and not supply basic snags and steak. povo c***.
Spook
Posts: 19780
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
team spook prefer to bring their own steak to bbq's

we usually suggest that to others at ours

bring your own meat

team spook bbq's are awesome
Tim Tibbetts
Posts: 1913
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
If the people I was inviting actually cared about this sort of crap I wouldn't invite them....Seriously there's not f***ing rule, it's a BBQ..actually there is a rule "Take it easy and enjoy the beer".
Crizane Tribal
Posts: 1950
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Yeah for my last BBQ I put on snags, burger patties, bacon, rolls and condiments and just told people it was fine to bring something more interesting for themselves if they wanted or needed to.

I guess what really matters is who is the mate and what do they do (and where's MY invite? :P). Somebody who works full time in a half decent job should at least put on some snags and bread, but I wouldn't expect a student working part time to provide any meat.
twat
Posts: 120
Location: UK

Midda - fkn HIlarious...

Heardy - not a truer statement could be made
P.S. the snags over this side of the world (pork sausages are the 'default' snag, are s*** house, I want my mystery saw dust and other random bits of meat munched together pls! (seriously))


As for BBQ rules, just for interest it certainly does change depending on where you are in the world, from my experience
States - Beer and food provided usually 1 form of meat, BYO speacialised meat
Saffas - (ie Braai) ALL food, BYO alcoholic drinks
Aussie - Basic Food (ie snags and snacks) BYO alcoholic drinks
arclore
Posts: 48
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
just dont put your dick in the mash potato
mooby
Posts: 3639
Location: UK
i always get snags, burger patties and say chicken drummies. + salad, potatoe salad and at least a slab.

everyone comming norm brings their own booze and a few bits of meat too.
mooby
Posts: 3640
Location: UK
P.S. the snags over this side of the world (pork sausages are the 'default' snag, are s*** house, I want my mystery saw dust and other random bits of meat munched together pls! (seriously))


i concur! they are 20-25% water heardy. fry in a pan and you have to strain the pain afterwards. even bacon is the same.
Persay
Posts: 4661
Location: Other International
the extra b stands for byobbqb
exo
Posts: 7935
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
What's THAT extra B for?
Tollaz0r!
Posts: 8052
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
If you can afford it, you should provide snags and or rissole's. The stakes and whatnot are up to the guests as they can be expensive. If you've got some money to burn, buy all the meat.

Most normal people will bring their own stakes and whatnot if asked to and not care. If you do care, you have issues ;P
Spock
Posts: 571
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
every time i went to a byo meat bbq i always brought enough for 3 meals (not meals of meat only) seeing as i didnt bother keeping an eye on whats mine

plus it should only byo meat if your having a house warming and its last minute/day
giririsss
Posts: 2605
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Who the f*** cares. if you care, you're already more flaming than the bbq anyway.

infi
Posts: 7117
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
yeah it's not really a problem worth caring about until the host cares so little they forget to say it's BYO and the guests care so little they bring nothing. Then you're all f***ed!
IncrEdible_vEgetable
Posts: 907
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
For that comment, I will say that not all Vegetarians have "pasty skin".
Also that vegetarians also have a right to be at a bbq even if they don't eat MEAT!


You're not big on sarcasm, are you?

As for vegeatrians at BBQs, great the more the merrier. More meat for me as far as I'm concerned. Just don't stand there saying "Ewww how can you eat that? It's all bloody..." "That's disgusting...so many dead animals just so you can have your sausage" "Look out, I don't want my tofu pattie in the meat juices" "Oh noes my eggplant touched a steak now I'll have to throw it away." etc etc. Cos that s***s me to tears.

Some Fat Bastard
Posts: 233
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
It came,it mooed, I ate it.

Vegetarians seem to forget that to increase the brain size of our ancestors, to which we owe a load of gratitude, they required large doses of protein which only when our ancestors added to their diet meat such volumes of protein became available. In essence without the inclusion in our ancestors diet of meat we'd still be swinging from trees.
Midda
Posts: 1069
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/images/bigpot6.jpg
boba
Cainer
Posts: 2785
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Anyone who has been to one of my BBQs will know I usually (over)provide everything, sometimes including booze.
been a long time since i've been to one of those, when's the next? =P
trixx
Posts: 12
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
i'd say the host provides basic meat, sausages, maybe some rissoles, bread sauce etc and maybe get people to bring some snacks or salads or whatever. you don't really want everyone bringing all their own meat, then everyone cooking their stuff becomes a real bitch BYO snacks/salads and drinks i say
captivate
Posts: 1070
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
I generally would say that the host provides meats when asking attendees to bring a plate of something to share - salads, potatos, dessert etc.

Alternatively Ive been to a BBQ where the host provided a selection of salads and we were asked to bring what meat we wanted.
Twinsen
Posts: 73
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
Last BBQ I hosted, it was BYO BBQ, Meat, and Drinks.
mission
Posts: 3376
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
So you really hosted nothing?
Hogfather
Posts: 1375
Location: Cairns, Queensland
He provided a venue for the BBQ to occur within?

Had a BBQ last night, was thinking about this thread. We must be feeling flush with cash because there was only steak & chicken breast available, with a token few snags for the kids.

Far, far f***ing worse than vegetarians are the motherf***ing gluten intolerants (celiacs). We had one show up last night, a late addition of one of our guests - "can I bring PersonX?!" at like 5:30pm.

So no, you f***ing dried up old c***rag mole, I did not plan the f***ing meal with you in mind. Yes it is f***ing lucky that you brought your own god damn rice chips or whatever the hell it was you were chewing on.
mission
Posts: 3377
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
If it's a condition that the person was born with or aquired, that's a bit harsh.

It's the people that choose to do something and then make a song and dance that is gay.
Tanaka Khan
Posts: 4418
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
I was planning a BBQ with a few work mates next weekend and intended on supplying everything, but now I've decided to have it catered (Nando's FTW). I'm still paying for the whole thing seeing as I did the inviting, the only thing I'm having the others bring is the alcohol they want to drink (soft drink will be provided too).
Crizane Tribal
Posts: 1952
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
What if the slack, cheap, lazy prick asks everybody to bring some sort of snacks or nibblies to share?
Twinsen
Posts: 77
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
lucky this thread did pop up, I've just had a whole bunch of ppl invite themselves to my house next week end for a bbq, and I was the last person 2 know :(.

Persay
Posts: 4664
Location: Other International
^^^^ grow a pair?
Hogfather
Posts: 1376
Location: Cairns, Queensland
If it's a condition that the person was born with or aquired, that's a bit harsh.


I don't have a problem making sure that there are alternatives available for people with medical requirements.

But whinging and bitching that the food isn't all to suit your need when you weren't invited drove me nuts. Especially when my wife pretty much went out of her way to make sure that there was something available.


last edited by Hogfather at 18:00:04 14/Oct/07
CHUB
Posts: 3335
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
I'm 99% vego,

I just bite the bullet at BBQ's, out on town or in other situations.

I might only eat a piece of meat once a month, but it's purely out of convenience so I don't piss everyone else off so it's no skin off their nose.

The Simpsons was right, you can't make friends with salad.

For BBQ's I ALWAYS bring my f***ing awesome potato bake, once you get some piss into you, hot cheesey bacon filled potato bake is more of a winner then a steak.
Scooter
Posts: 1016
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
I didn't know it was possible but i've lost even more respect for you Chub.

P.S. A Patato Bake riddled with Bacon Bit's isn't really a Vego meal.
CHUB
Posts: 3336
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
It's a social occasion, I eat meat just so I don't inconvenience everyone else.

Trust me, everybody hates vegetarians, even if you don't complain, if you do... you just won't get invited.

I don't like factory farming, if I kill the animal myself it's guilt free.
Persay
Posts: 4665
Location: Other International
when you meet girls are they impressed by how much of a unique snowflake you are chub?
Crizane Tribal
Posts: 1955
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Haha, BAM.

I love how CHUB has gone from a knife-wielding maniac who goes out and hunts, kills and butchers his own meat to a vegetarian wuss bag in the blink of an eye.
nF
Forum Hero
Posts: 13463
Location: Wynnum, Queensland
he hunts for his salad
paveway
Posts: 6093
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

hahha persay
mission
Posts: 3383
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Veges feel pain too you know.
Chakas
Posts: 2371
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Plants are people too.
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