When you are dropping a two bomb, do read?

I have a big stack of Vice magazines and Adbusters.

While pooping I read Dickens and Dostoyevsky, and I am moved by what I read.

No

I thought this thread was going to be about offline browsing. *sigh*

And to answer the question, 'No.' - I have never been in there long enough to get through a page, much less a chapter. Maybe some licorice is in order for you dudes.

Get in, get it done, get out.

Reading in the s***ter is just nasty.

yeah I've got a 4x4 mag subscription

Well seeing as i am not 70 years old, i dont have time to read while using the toilet.

werd Hogfather

werd. the greatest distraction free opportunity to read :]

i read qgl

+1 Hogfather.

1) If you take that long to give birth you got problems
2) I can think of better places to read than in a small room surrounded by s*** vapour

i read qgl

Appropriate for the loo, most of the posts on here are s***.

When you are dropping a two bomb, do read?

If you have enough time to read during a poop, you're doing it wrong.

If you don't need to 'go' anytime soon, defer the trip. Simple.

shouldn't be in a hurry anyway, take your time and you'll be fine

+1 Hogfather.

Another vote here for commando pooping. Get in, accomplish the mission, get out.
Why suffer any stench longer than necessary?

I thought this thread was going to be about offline browsing. *sigh*

I thought it was going to be about dumping boy/girlfriends & maybe a psychic reading or something.

I don't read anything, I just sit & watch current events unfold on the 70" plasma I have in the bathroom.

well our bathroom is also a laundry and shower etc etc so ventilation is adequate, it's a great way to wake up imo

great way to wake up? what the f*** your posts are weird tequila

I take Atlas Shrugged, but normally there are a heap of old gaming magazines in the boys toilet and just crappy gossip mags in the main toilet

does your husband like to read while you take the dump, or is the sensation of a dump on his chest enough for him?

*giggle*

what you dont have a routine when you wake up?

- bed
- kettle
- s***
- shave
- shower
- coffee
- dressed
- train

all done easily in less than 20 minutes with a few quiet mins of reading time while I'm waking up

Just do it in the shower.
It all goes down the same pipe.
Saves on paper too.

great way to wake up? what the f*** your posts are weird tequila

ahahah this made me laugh out loud

I like to eat and read, can't concentrate on reading when taking a dump because the paper would shake vigorously from all the pushing.

Yeah, always. Unless i go at work, which is the norm, splash for cash AYE

i refuse to s*** without sufficient reading material.

I speed-s***. Max time wasted s***ting is 2 minutes.

I read that you're not supposed to read when taking a dump because you end up sitting there too long and develop hernias. And no, I was not taking a dump when I read this, I believe it was another quality news.com.au article.

Depends if someone puts a new mag in there to read, and what I ate the night before.

Why suffer any stench longer than necessary?

because my s*** smells like roses.

duh!

nothing to read in my dunny, though I sit in my brother's loo for ~30 mins reading his gaming mags

I'm sorry reading material in the toilet inevitably gets pissed on!
I personally hate taking a dump sometimes so the quicker the better.

i get new weekly from a bird at work, i read that in the s***ter

picture, people, fhm, zoo, ralph.

you end up sitting there too long and develop hernias

So if i sit down for awhile i risk hernias? f***, i'm never sitting again.

I read sometimes when i'm s***ting but usually its the same magazine over and over. Sometimes i sit there for 10 mins after ive finished and keep reading.

Weird.

i either read the australian on my phone, answer emails on my blackberry, or read a biography.

iphone internets

i can read crap posts while I crap

I have this massive book of facts, it's from like 50s, everything in it is f***ing wrong, and the pages are stained with s*** and piss.

The human body is actually designed so that when you squat it makes for the most effective way to defeacalate.
Sitting is actually unnatural.

ayn rand

perfect reading for the s***ter and also if you are out of paper

I only know of Ayn Rand because of a South Park episode. :P

Also, my faith in humanity is restored - other people also share the opinion that if you have time to read anything while doing a #2, ur doin it wrong.

read or sudoku

isnt there some sort of injury you can get from forcing out ur s*** too fast?

Yeah, and also I even take my internet enabled phone with me so I read my Google Reader.

I take in my web camera phone so I can browse and upload to ratemypoo without delay.

eat fibre guys

Posting while dumping

The human body is actually designed so that when you squat it makes for the most effective way to defeacalate. Sitting is actually unnatural.

QFT.

isnt there some sort of injury you can get from forcing out ur s*** too fast?

lol yeah, teh same thing pregnant women get when giving birth if they push too hard

anal fissure, so take your time and you'll be fine!

Latest novel I'm reading or wifeys trash mags. Take your time and enjoy the experience boys!

I am taking a s*** in this thread while taking a s***. Top of the mornin to ya.

When my brother lived at home there were Ralph/FHMs in there. Now he's gone and I have moved back in (joy) there is nothing in there. I slightly miss reading the awesome articles.

I don't get the whole go to have a s*** and stay in there for 15 minutes thing, what can take that long, really?

15 minutes? sometimes i stay 40 minutes im so engrossed in reading

You spend 40 minutes in a confined room sitting one foot above a pool of s***?

Think about it.

Pretty disgusting habit imo

How should women s***/fart?

The human body is actually designed so that when you squat it makes for the most effective way to defeacalate.
Sitting is actually unnatural.

i think you mean the human body has evolved that way.

eat fibre guys

Take the All Bran two week challenge!

P.S. It works... :P

isnt there some sort of injury you can get from forcing out ur s*** too fast?

If you "bear down" while dumping you can develop haemorrhoids, AKA piles. If you have a proper diet (eat your f***en weetbix) you won't need to entertain yourself while having a poo.

anal fissure, so take your time and you'll be fine!

A quick google relates that to constipation, so it really has no relation to people who can get their business done in a timely manner.
I really didnt expect much from this thread, I havent been disappointed.

15 minutes? sometimes i stay 40 minutes im so engrossed in reading

40 mins... thats enough time for the cooties to crawl up out of the bowl and infest uranus.

i think you mean the human body has evolved that way.

No the Monkey body did.
Have you ever seen a monkey on a toilet ?

actually, I've seen a money use a toilet

I read alpha magazine on the s***ter and then substitute in the AFR Magazine from the FRiday issue if it doesn't last the month.

At work I normally take the paper to the s***ter, and if its a Monday I always take the careers section and the weekend shopper from the Saturday paper :)

Every now and then, just to annoy the receptionist, I grab the paper on the way out, take it to the s***ter and then drop it back at reception on the way back. The look of disgust she gives me is worth it every time!

A guy where I used to work would do that. (Take the communal paper to the can with him and bring it back at the end of his break.) I didn't put in the few dollars a week towards the news paper subscription though, so I wasn't allowed to look at it so I didn't really care. Bothered the others though.

Nope. I like to take a minimalist s***.

Speaking of though.. after spending a few months in thailand and vietnam I got down with the handheld spray Bidet and I am about to install one in my joint. Gunna be sweet. Pretty much gunna cut my cleaning time down by a massive amount.
http://www.lusan.com.au/images/ProductImages/SANY3062h.jpg

last edited by ctd at 01:03:39 15/Feb/09

heh, i used to take the work paper to the s***ter all the time:

I want to import one of the Japanese toilets.. f***ing love those things. Now THERE is a reason to spend 40 minutes on the toilet with that lovely luke warm jet of water.

wanting a warm jet of water up your arse hole is gayer than reading on the toilet just fyi

nah, taking it up the ass is gay.


Warm water is just warm water.

what you dont have a routine when you wake up?

- bed
- kettle
- s***
- shave
- shower
- coffee
- dressed
- train

all done easily in less than 20 minutes with a few quiet mins of reading time while I'm waking up

your bloody good if you can do that all in 20mins... f*** i am such a women... i am flat out just having breakfast and getting ready in 20mins..

teq, cast your mind back to the days before your arsehole was stretched into a cavernous cum receptacle and you can probably imagine how for most us, the water simply splashes directly off the convergeance of the buttcheeks as opposed to directly entering the arsehole itself

you don't have to justify your love of anal massage to me Jim, I just have a rule of keeping it an exit hole only

Warm jets of water sure beats sticking your hand under there and wiping it yourself. It's all good hygiene really (and the sensual feeling of warm water).

All tingly like.

i draw on the walls

reading how you people s*** in toilets creeps me out a little..

why do you prefer watching the deed?